So often I spend so much of my time looking ahead, asking the Lord where He is leading me, demanding that He guide me along the path that He has for me. All the while I find myself losing sight of…Him.
To be honest, this has been one of the hardest semesters of my life. I've been overwhelmed at times with loneliness, confusion, fear, insecurity, and inadequacy. I've had quite a few moments where I've doubted everything. So many negative thoughts have plagued my mind: “What in the world are you doing?” “You aren't smart enough for seminary.” “How do you expect this all to work out?”
“Remember it is I who orchestrate the events of your life. Don’t try to figure out what is happening. Simply trust Me and thank Me in advance for the good that will come out of it all. I know the plans I have for you, and they are good.” These words came to mind while I was spending time in God's Word recently. They convicted me and challenged me. It's so difficult to let go and allow God to lead.
To be certain of God means that we are uncertain in all our ways, we do not know what a day may bring forth. This is generally said with a sigh of sadness, it should rather be an expression of breathless expectation. We are uncertain of the next step, but we are certain of God.
I've read this verse so many times, but today I’m comforted by the fact that even when I have no idea where my life is headed, He knows. God never promises that we will understand His will for our lives. That we will understand why He has us where He does right now. He does however promise to guard our anxious hearts and minds with a peace that transcends all understanding (Phil. 4:7). A peace that is somehow more comforting than actually knowing.